


Dear Lady Gentina

by ambiguously



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Epistolary, F/F, Padmé Amidala Lives, Past Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker, Post-Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, Space Pirates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2018-10-13 17:40:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10518633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ambiguously/pseuds/ambiguously
Summary: Padmé flees into hiding with an old friend while her daughter grows up under the care of her adoptive parents.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sweven](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sweven/gifts).



Padmé had learned many post-birth traditions as part of her education in the ways of the wider galaxy. On Naboo, a woman stayed in her childbed for one week, resting with her infant and taking visitors only as she chose. On some worlds, mothers stayed in the home for a full year. On others, they taught their children to climb within the same day. There were no traditions to guide her now. The day of her babies' birth, she sat upright, tired and numb, holding her daughter as Bail piloted his ship towards the planet where Padmé must leave her.

She could still feel the soft brush of Luke's hair on her hips as she'd kissed him goodbye and watched Obi-Wan walk away. Leia slept in her arms now, tiny and beautiful. Padmé kissed her as much as she could bear. The only safety was in hiding. The only hope was in separation.

"You know," Bail said, apologetic for disturbing the little time she had left with her daughter. "You could stay on. No one would question if we brought on a nurse for her. You've played similar roles before."

She choked back the longing. He was only doing what a friend could, offering her a chance to watch her child grow. "The longer I stay with her, the more danger she'll be in."

"I know."

The baby stirred, settling in her sleep, mouth opening in a yawn. Padmé memorized every detail of her face, each strand of her hair. If she had no moments than these, she would treasure what she had, and she would not regret losing them with her son. She had too many other regrets taking hold of her now. Anakin should be at her side, should be fussing over his children, should be whole and well. Obi-Wan said there had been fire, and she still felt invisible fingers at her throat.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I'm sorry we kept it secret."

He nodded, but with kindness. "It wasn't really a secret. You were always happy when you were together. I'm so sorry."

"So am I."

"Stay with us for a week. Give yourself time. Give Leia time."

Leia blinked her eyes open. Rather than crying, she set her unfocused gaze on her mother's face.

"A week," Padmé said. She could risk that much.

* * *

It wasn't her childbed, but it was a nursery, and none entered save the baby's new parents. Padmé rested in the firm, comfortable lounge where Alderaanian mothers had spent their time for generations. She fed her baby every few hours, and bathed her with damp cloths, and cleaned her when she was wet. She refused to acknowledge the pang of jealousy when Queen Breha took her turn cuddling with Leia, and pressing her own nose against the tiny one. This was new for her, too. Leia must learn quickly that she was loved by the people who would remain with her when Padmé fled these walls.

Padmé had just set Leia into her cradle to sleep when the door opened. She tensed each time, expecting an attack, expecting Anakin, not knowing what to expect.

Breha joined her by the cradle. A different tension filled her. She had two days left here. She dared stay no longer.

"I can write you letters. As often as you want." Breha met Padmé's eyes. "I can't imagine how hard this is for you. Anything that either of us can do to ease your pain, please just name it."

"Letters are dangerous. I can't tell you where I'll be, what name I'll be using."

"I've thought of that. I often send letters. Bail has teased me that it's an affectation when I could simply use the transmitter, but I enjoy the luxury of the time I spend writing. There's a post stop on Onderon. I'll address the letters to Lady Gentina Velvet, an old school friend. You or an agent can retrieve them as you need." She took Padmé's hand and squeezed. "You will always be welcome here."

"Thank you." She meant the thanks, but she knew that once she stepped away, the woman beside her would always be Leia's mother. Padmé would be an old acquaintance, a family friend. She would watch her child look at Breha with love and with impatience and with all the mix of emotions a growing girl experienced.

Breha was no fool. She read this easily in Padmé's sad eyes, and knew there was no reassurance, no answer. She offered none. Instead, she said, "If you'd like, I will help you cut your hair while she's napping."

Padmé had been unaware of the weight of her own hair until long locks fell to the floor under the silver scissors. Her head felt light, almost dizzy, and the cool on the back of her neck distressed her. She held Breha's mirror in her hand, watching the silhouette of her face alter as the framing loops and strands she had always worn vanished. The new cut flattered her, but she felt like a stranger.

* * *

"I've arranged your transportation," Bail said, watching Padmé from the doorway. She knew her week was finished, knew she had to let go. Another minute. Five. Leia would not appreciate the time, but Padmé would hold onto these moments forever.

In her heart, she cursed Bail Organa for pulling her away now. Arranged transportation, told her to leave.

No. She owed him her gratitude, and the love that their long friendship had gained. He would protect her child. He had found her safe passage away. He....

"Padmé?" said a different voice. A cloaked stranger joined him at the door. Bail stepped inside, plucking Leia from Padmé's arms as she stood, joy bursting through her. Ahsoka removed her hood and threw her arms around Padmé's neck.

"You're alive?"

Ahsoka's mouth curled against her neck in a sad smile before she pulled away. She'd grown since they'd last spoken. She was taller than Padmé now. "One advantage to no longer being a Jedi. When the command went out to hunt down everyone else, my name wasn't on the list." Her voice caught and fluttered in her chest. She wore the mad, hunted look of one who hadn't slept much in the last week, and perhaps not much before that, either.

"It's good to see you." A beat passed. Her own lack of sleep from the nights awake with her daughter finally caught up with Bail's words. "You're my transportation?"

"Senator Organa said you needed a discreet escort. Apparently, you've been pronounced dead." There was a spark of hope in her words. "I'd like to believe there are more. Have you heard anything from Anakin or Obi-Wan?"

She didn't know. Padmé gave a quick, sharp smile to Bail, who held his daughter silently. "Nothing," she said, and watched Ahsoka's heart plummet. Lying to her felt wrong in Padmé's mouth, but the fewer people who knew the other secrets she kept, the safer both of her children would remain. "I'm sorry. I was hoping, too."

* * *

Ahsoka's ship was a light freighter, built for speed but ready for cargo.

Her partner was a monster.

Padmé reached for a blaster she didn't carry, ready to defend herself as Asajj Ventress rolled her eyes. She'd regained her lightsabers or crafted new ones, the handles hanging from her belt unlit. Padmé and Ventress turned to Ahsoka at the same moment. Ahsoka stepped between them, hands raised.

"Yes, she's coming with us," she said to Ventress. "Yes, she's with me," she said to Padmé. There was no one for Padmé to turn to. They'd chosen to depart in the middle of the night. She'd said her farewells to her friends, and kissed her baby, and she was alone except for one old friend and one old enemy.

"You trust her?" she asked Ahsoka.

"I do."

She stepped aboard the ship.

* * *

The name she used for the first few weeks was Adita Oran. Adita carried herself like a brash trader, coarsening her language and brandishing her weapon in the seedy bars where they haggled for trade. A bit of light smuggling here, unquestioning transportation there. Padmé tried not to wonder what crimes their passengers were fleeing. It was far easier to let herself imagine they helped refugees relocating during the tumultuous upheaval of this new Empire. The lie let her sleep at night.

She had her own cabin aboard their ship. One was reserved for passengers as they had them. Ahsoka shared the third tiny cabin with Ventress.

"You don't understand," Ahsoka said that first morning, seeing the expression on Padmé's face as she discovered the third room was empty.

"I don't have to understand. You said you trust her."

Ahsoka nodded.

"Then I'm happy for you. I'm the last person in the galaxy to be giving advice about relationships." The pain hit her in unexpected places. She'd been used to waking alone. The mornings she'd opened her eyes to see Anakin beside her had been too few. Over this past week, she had awakened to the sounds of her daughter, and this morning's empty room stabbed at her heart in ways she couldn't find words sorrowful enough to express.

Ahsoka's eyes softened. "I never asked, but I saw how much you and Anakin cared for each other. I'm so sorry."

She believed her Master was dead. She didn't know about their secret marriage, about their children.

"Thank you," Padmé said, and turned towards the galley to get together some breakfast before the sadness in her own eyes gave her away.

* * *

"My dearest Lady Gentina," said Breha's letter. "I hope this message finds you well. It has been too long since we last spoke, and I have so much to tell you! Bail and I have at long last been blessed with a daughter. Leia is three months old as I write this, and as full of smiles as you could ever imagine. I've included a few pictures for you, and a souvenir from her first haircut."

Padmé couldn't read the rest of the letter, not for a while, not with the way her eyes misted. Carefully tucked in among several beaming holos of her daughter was a sealed packet holding a curl of brown hair tied with a tiny ribbon. When she could finally read, clasping the treasured gift in her palm, she immersed herself in every delighted description of cooing, and grasping, and spittle spread all over a rosy wee face.

"I've gone on so long about Leia. My apologies. I do hope you and your sister are in good health. Pass along my regards to her, and remind her we must take tea together when she and her entourage are next on Alderaan."

* * *

The first HoloNet blast calling for Ahsoka Tano's arrest or termination came right after they'd picked up a rowdy band of "merchants," by which Padmé understood to mean "pirates." They had gathered in the ship's small common area when the message came through. Padmé didn't miss how every pair or triplet of eyes flittered towards Ahsoka before casually glancing away.

Ventress leaned in closer. "Ashla," she said in a fake whisper. "Do you know where your sister is hiding?"

"I haven't spoken with her in two years," said Ahsoka. "If the reward's good enough, I might have to find out where she's gone." This earned her low chuckles from a few of their passengers. Only the leader, a stern Telite woman, kept her thoughtful gaze on Ahsoka's back.

Padmé watched, and she listened. The moment they were alone, she said, "We can't afford to stop more than a few minutes at the rendezvous. They suspect you. They'll turn you in for the bounty."

"If we leave too swiftly, they'll know for certain."

Padmé was unhappy with the call, but Ventress owned the ship and had the final say, and at the moment, it pleased her to do as Ahsoka wished. Padmé had given up her cabin for the trip, bunking uneasily with the pair of them. She'd never caught them out in more than a fervent, biting kiss, and tonight they demurred from anything more. She could hear them talking, but she could not make out the words. Restlessly, she rolled in her tumble of blankets on the floor. She had lived aboard this ship for six months (six months away from her children) (six months since she last saw Anakin) (babies crawled at this age, didn't they?) (had he recovered from his injuries?) (was he thinking about her?). In that time, she'd observed her friend and her former foe, and still could not find the angle that explained what they'd built between them during Ahsoka's absence. Ventress was a vicious killer, taught to serve the Sith and hate the light. Ahsoka was a bright beacon of promise, the first daughter Padmé had tentatively helped to raise into a clever, talented young woman. They ought to fight, and they did at times, but over what jobs to take and how much fare to charge. Tonight, wrapped together in their bunk a few paces away, they settled into a calm rest afforded by a perfect, easy trust which should have been unimaginable.

* * *

"My good Gentina, how are you? I'm sorry I missed your last visit to the Core. I do hope we can catch up soon. I've been terribly busy with matters of state, and of course, the baby. I've sent along pictures. She's growing so fast, you would hardly believe it."

* * *

"She's been taken." The cold horror on Ahsoka's face snapped Padmé back from her musing. She'd seen a little human girl, about a year old, and her heart had swelled as she touched the necklace with the secret back which held the curl of Leia's hair.

Taken? Finally, she settled into the present. "Ventress?" Ahsoka nodded, worry nailing her to the ground. "What's happened?"

"She went to pick up supplies from the other side of the market. There were guards waiting for her. I heard the blasts. She's been stunned and carried off. We have to find her!"

Her voice rose as she spoke. Padmé took her hands and walked her away from the crowd of other shoppers towards the wall of the closest building, and she replied in a low voice to encourage her friend to do the same. "We'll find her. Don't worry. Did you see which direction they went in?"

"I was too far away."

At least she'd been aware enough not to go after them with lightsabers blazing. There remained the chance that Ventress had been picked up on a routine operation. They operated on the grayer edges of the law these days. Send in a Jedi, and they'd be known as the very wanted women they really were. "We'll check the constable's station first."

She allowed herself one moment of weakness, letting her head turn to where she'd seen the little girl and her parents. They were long gone.

A few questions got them pointed towards the station. They walked by together, chatting about the great bargain Padmé had gotten on her bag of fruit, while the guards out from ignored them. There were no windows, and it scaled up several stories into the air, surrounded by other tall buildings.

"We'll have to walk in," said Ahsoka.

"Your face is on Wanted holos all over the galaxy. I'm supposed to be dead. I'll walk in."

"As what?"

"Her lawyer."

They hurried back to the ship, where Padmé dressed in the most imperious outfit she could put together from the few garments the three of them possessed. Then she made her way to the constable's station, where she demanded to see her client, giving Ventress's current alias.

The clerk at the front desk had dealt with demanding lawyers before, but never one who'd learned her lessons in front of the Galactic Senate. The alien stammered and stalled, cowed by Padmé's rapid-fire quoting of laws that didn't technically exist here but sounded good. He led her back to the Chief Constable, who folded two of his four arms, unimpressed.

"Your client is a wanted felon on six worlds."

"She is entitled to due process of the law."

The other two arms shrugged. "Does that happen before or after her execution? We've already arranged to extradite her. Kaltos is the nearest system with a warrant out for her arrest and have offered us a generous reward for turning her over." He leaned in closer. "They're also interested in the whereabouts of her known associates."

Padmé was not intimidated. "I'm sure they'll be located soon enough. May I join my client aboard your transport?" Together, they might sort out a plan.

"No. The ship leaves in a few minutes, and we don't have time to process you. You can join her on Kaltos, if they don't shoot her upon arrival."

Padmé thanked him coldly and stalked out of the building. She didn't run. She didn't dare flee. They suspected, but they didn't know.

"Ahsoka," she said over their commlink when she was well clear, "we have to make a pickup."

Their ship was ready to go the moment she was aboard. Ahsoka had already sliced into the communications grid of the police transport. As Padmé lifted off, she scanned the layout of the ship. "They have her in custody here," she said, and Padmé glanced at the hologram.

"That's by the hull."

"Yes."

She could read Ahsoka's plan in her eyes. "I'll keep us steady."

The police transport was ahead of them on its upward trajectory. Padmé kept pace, looking like nothing but another ship headed out. As soon as they left atmosphere, the other transport would be looking for their hyperspace jump. They wouldn't have much time.

Padmé brought their ship closer, activating the erratic cloaking field that had saved their lives twice and almost killed them three times. It hummed and caught. They could be seen from a viewport, not from a scanner. She hovered the ship just above the other.

Ahsoka was ready in the airlock. At Padmé's signal, she opened herself to space, using the Force to draw herself towards the other ship. The external camera didn't show much, and her face was covered by her oxygen mask. Padmé couldn't read the fear or the determination in her eyes, could only keep her flight utterly steady as Ahsoka lit her lightsabers and cut into the hull of the other ship, slicing out a circular hole.

The cutout blew out, and with it a plume of air as the atmosphere from that one compartment vented into space.

A moment later, Ventress was pushed out of the hole, gusted on the blast of air. Ahsoka grabbed her with the Force, and shoved a mask into her hands, helping her to cover her face before she asphyxiated. 

The police transport shuddered with the hull breach. The few schematics they'd found in their hurried search said the compartment would be sealed immediately. That didn't stop the other pilot from jerking away and down, changing the course back to the planet for an emergency landing.

Padmé changed her own course to follow, keeping her eyes on the pair clinging to the top. If she got too close, she'd crush them both. If she didn't reach them in time, they'd burn up as the ship re-entered the atmosphere. No pressure, she thought, and edged closer. She wasn't an ace pilot. That had always been Anakin's joy, and Obi-Wan's amusement. Now she had to reach out with all her own skill.

The ships aligned.

On the camera, she watched as Ahsoka and Ventress made the leap from the transport to their own ship. The moment the airlock door light came on, Padmé peeled away from the other vessel and soared back towards space. Within moments, they were among the stars, and as the other two reached the cockpit, Padmé hit the navicomputer and jerked them into the freedom of hyperspace.

The masks had saved their lungs and eyes, but both Ahsoka and Ventress had incipient frostbite from the cold vacuum exposure. Padmé let the ship follow the course she'd plotted while she pulled out the medikit.

"We've got it, thanks," Ahsoka said, taking the kit and pulling out the healing salve. She warmed a dab in her palm and rubbed it over Ventress's arms.

"You were out there longer." Ventress saw the angry blotches over Ahsoka's skin. "Much longer. We should treat those."

"It's fine. We will."

Padmé caught her eye and nodded. They'd tend to each other better than she could. As she stepped out of the cabin, Ventress said quietly, "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

* * *

"Dear Lady Gentina,

It seems like forever since your visit! My daughter is growing like a flower in the sunlight, all long stalk and sweet, sunny smiles. I have enclosed pictures from her birthday party. As you can see, she loves cake, especially in her hair."

* * *

Jobs were harder to find this far out. Smuggling wasn't needed when the nearest law officer was fifty light years away. They parked the ship on a green, quiet world Padmé had never heard of back when she'd lived and breathed galactic politics.

Ahsoka's great patience with children made her an excellent tutor for the local landowners wealthy enough to pay her, and a good teacher after hours for the children whose parents couldn't pay but who still wanted to learn.

Padmé watched her friend's students, wondering how her own children were growing under the dark shadow of the Empire. She couldn't bear to think of them long. Instead, she took work as a scribe. Laws must be kept, and deals must be notarized, and she had long ago mastered the art of sounding like she knew best when she bartered disputes between one farm and the next.

Ventress did not take on work. She stayed close to their rented home, and she complained about the allergens in the air making her eyes water, and she cooked their meals and kept the rooms clean. "We aren't staying," she told Ahsoka, over and over. "I should be fighting, not making house."

"Too much fighting made us too famous. We can rest here for a while longer." She praised the meal, and teased the cook, and took her back to their own room after while Padmé washed the bowls and reread the last letter she'd received from Queen Breha. Not everything was about Leia. Bits of the wider galaxy crept in through the words. People were rounded up. Planets were brought under martial law. Nowhere was safe, though Breha and Bail kept their daughter as safe as they could.

Padmé touched her necklace, and she knew Ventress was right. They could not stay here.

* * *

"My dear Lady Gentina, I hope this letter finds you well. The galaxy we grew up in is not the same these days, I'm afraid. I find myself worried for old friends in this dark new days. Bail and I can only do so much in our own spheres of influence, given our responsibilities to those we cherish, but I believe you will be pleased to know we intend to light candles wherever we can. Leia is talking non-stop these days, and already she is happy to speak up about justice and freedom. I've even made a short recording of her chattering away, which I've enclosed with this letter."

* * *

"I met someone."

This was not the announcement Ventress, or Padmé for that matter, expected Ahsoka to make over their late meal. The temperature in the room dropped as Ventress asked, "Did you?"

Ahsoka didn't blink. "There is a small cell of revolutionaries in the village. I've known about them for a while. Cracta is more or less the leader." Padmé knew that name as a parent of one of Ahsoka's less wealthy students. "She put me in touch with her contact in the Mid-Rim. There's been anti-Imperial activity going on in small ways all over."

"That's no surprise," Ventress said, still considering the start of the conversation.

Padmé followed her meaning more readily. "You've met with one of the rebels."

"There's not much to work with. I was hoping I'd find a more organized group, but the cells out there, from what I can gather, are much the same as the one here: farmers, children, and disillusioned survivors from the war. Their numbers are growing. They could use help from those who know how to fight," she nodded to Padmé, "and those who know how to plan."

The young Rebellion already had some planners, Padmé knew. Lighting candles. Raising a child and an army both.

Ventress said, "The three of us are presumed dead. If we get involved with anti-Imperial activities, we're going to be found." Her tone, more appeased now, suggested she wasn't opposed to what Ahsoka was considering, merely cautious.

"It's a risk. But you like taking risks." The smile moved into a more teasing grin.

Ahsoka had already made up her mind. Padmé could see the spark in her eyes. She'd go alone if she felt she must. Ventress would follow her anywhere, though, and two powerful women together could cause a great deal of trouble for this new Empire. Three might find the means to topple it.

Padmé asked, "When do we leave?"

* * *

They rendezvoused with the ship in a barren sector even the Empire hadn't found a way to exploit yet. Padmé's nerves threatened to eat her alive as the airlocks docked and engaged. She shouldn't have come. They should have stayed hidden. They couldn't trust all the souls aboard the other ship.

The airlock opened. His own face a mask of nervous apprehension, Bail Organa waited on the other side.

"It's good to see you," he said, and his eyes didn't betray what she was certain was a lie.

Ahsoka was less reserved, stepping forward to take his hand in a warm shake. "We've remained hidden long enough. We're here to help."

"Any help you can offer would be appreciated." His eyes glanced to Ventress, nodding to her. "All of you."

"Don't make me regret coming along," she said with an icy smile. She didn't like him, as she'd made clear during their passage here.

Ahsoka said, "We will have far stranger allies than this before the end." She took Ventress's hand and squeezed. If Bail registered the gesture, again his face did not give him away. "Are all the people aboard trustworthy?"

"Enough. I recommend cloaks if you've brought them, for safety's sake." The discomfort on his face grew as they donned their traveling garb. "Padmé, could I have a word alone? I'll return shortly for the two of you."

She nodded, and allowed him to lead her through his ship without her companions. Bail was her friend. He had good reasons not to trust Ventress, but Padmé trusted him. They moved quickly through almost empty corridors until they reached a hatch which opened under his handprint. The door slid open, and he waved her inside.

"I wasn't sure how much you'd told them."

Padmé's heart stopped for one moment, as she saw the little girl playing happily by herself on the rug. Bail scooped her up into a hug as she giggled, ignoring the new lady with her daddy in favor of poking at her daddy's nose.

"What name are you using?" he asked Padmé, an unreadable fear in his voice.

"Gaya."

"Leia, this is my friend Gaya. Can you say hello?"

"Hello," said her daughter obediently, looking at her with a directness that had never known how to be shy. Chestnut hair framed her face in curls.

"Hello, Leia. It's nice to meet you."

Leia turned back to her daddy, and now Padmé could read his face, could hear the words under every letter Breha had sent. This was their child, and they loved her with all their souls, and at any time, Padmé might walk back into their lives and try to take her back.

"I haven't told them anything. Ahsoka may never forgive me when she finds out."

"How much can you trust Ventress?"

"Ahsoka does, and I trust her judgement. Bail?"

His face twitched, still caught in his worry.

"Your daughter is lovely. You and Breha must be very happy. I'm glad for you."

He nodded, the fear slowly melting. "We are. Thank you." He set Leia down, allowing her to return to her toys. "I have a gift for you."

Padmé stared at the child one moment longer. He hadn't called for her friends yet. Another secret. "What is it?"

He went to his desk and keyed in a code. One drawer slid open. He pulled out a small pile of flimsies. "I'm using two go-betweens who believe they are carrying something very different." He handed her the flimsies.

Curious, Padmé unfolded the first one. The crinkly material felt dust-dry under her fingers as she read:

_"Dear Master Mirradon,"_

_"So much has happened since last we spoke. The crop I told you about is nearly ready for harvesting. I am sure I can find a good price for the grain this year."_

She looked up at Bail, confused. She knew this handwriting. Obi-Wan had written messages for Anakin often. She returned to the letter.

_"My nephew Sal, the one I told you about, is growing every day. He speaks almost a dozen words now. I've enclosed a picture."_

Padmé lifted the folded flimsy, and found a flat picture of a little blond boy, taken from a short distance away. He was smiling in the bright sunlight.

"He writes every few months. I've saved these for Leia, but I think you might need them more." He gestured to a chair where Padmé could sit and read through the moments of Luke's life.

"Can you send for my friends?" she asked, forcing herself to pace her reading, allow this good moment to linger as long as she could. "I want to tell Ahsoka something important."

He nodded. "Will you watch Leia for a moment?" He didn't have to wait for her answer, as Padmé set the precious letters beside her before bending down to the rug to play with Bail's daughter.


End file.
